inhaaaaaale, exhaaaaaaale

when i started my first job scooping ice cream at baskin robbins back in my hometown in connecticut, i remember being tortured by dreams where i was just continuously, incessantly, obsessively scooping ice cream... scooping... scooping... scooping.

then, when i started my first post-college job as a research assistant here in beantown, i had dreams in which this little man was frantically trying to organize my thoughts into excel spreadsheets.

for the past two nights, my dreams have consisted of:

arms up on the inhale
exhale bow forward
inhale halfway lift
exhale high pushup, forward and down into low pushup
upward facing on the inhale
doooownward facing dog on the exhale
deep breath iiiin
and exhaaaale
inhaaaaale
exhaaaaale

repeat.

i'm not kidding!

so what's this all about, this repetitive loop i get into? the last time this happened (with the freakin' spreadsheets), i spent many nights in this weird limbo land -- not fully asleep but definitely not awake. i remember being terrified that there was something seriously wrong with me and that i'd never get another good night's sleep again.

this time, i realize that this process, this repetition in dreaming, is kind of like my psyche in overachiever mode. last night, i woke up, and told myself to relax. "you know this," i said. "go back to sleep. that's all you have to do right now." and it worked, for a while. hopefully tonight my mind will be a little more restful.

only one more day of rain until the sun comes out!